RISE OF THE UNICORN BRETHREN

[Stefunny]

I'll be gone for like a week and a half to two weeks. I'll play with y'all then.

</3

[AGar]

I'll be gone for like a week and a half to two weeks. I'll play with y'all then.

To quote the greatest movie of all time, Speed, featuring the greatest actor of all time, Keanu Reeves:

"Don't get dead."

[ReaperCharlie]

Reaper - here are my favorite two Marine Corps Stories:

Heroin Story:

Once upon a time in Afghanistan the ANA seized about 12 potato sacks
worth of processed heroin and brought it back to the district center I
was embedded in at the time and I accidentally snorted some of it (I
don't know how much heroin actually got in my system because I only
know a little bit about how to dose when smoking it or mainlining it)
and rubbed it all over my naked skin by accident to see if it would go
in through my pores accidentally. The whole time I was up on a guard
tower teaching my new guys how to use thermals I thought that we were
space marines because looking at mud huts through anpas 13s was so
surreal, and I ended up shooting flares at some dude's goats every
time he came out of his house (he thought it was as funny as I did).
Then some guy took a pop shot at us from a hill so I lit up the hill
hipfiring my saw and felt like a golden god slinging thunder watching
my tracers and peq 15 laser through my nods.

I still have the occasional vivid dreams about that night and how much
I accidentally enjoyed heroin still haunts me to this day.

The flares were even pull flares cause they were left over from when a
british MITT team or whatever you'd call them were chilling in the
district center before us, the guys that relieved us actually set the
market of the city on fire by shooting them randomly up in the air and
it got blamed on the taliban, also I was doing michael jackson dance
moves on top of my stryker at this district center for the benefit of
my buddies in the guard tower, not realizing that it would put me up
higher than the walls around the compound and some dickhead shot at me
so I played thriller over the PA system the civil affairs guy put on
the guard vehicle during prayer time in retribution

None of those memories haunt my dreams I just figured I'd add more details

This story is actually mine:

Wag Bag Story:

There was a Female Bootenant with CLB-5 engineers when we were setting
up FOB Marjah right after the invasion.

The Regiment S-3 Chief sent me over to ask her if we could get some
fuel from her tanker.

She looked at me and said "You guys got... fuel yesterday", to which I
responded "Ma'am, I need some more for my JP-8 Collection"

She wasn't amused and told me to go and find my staff NCO and have him
come talk to her.

So I went to GySgt Taylor, the Radio Chief that was with us on the
Forward, and he responded "Stupid Bitch", just go and steal that
shit!"

So we waited for the slutbutt to go off to take a shit, and 1/6 had
set up the little wagbag tents for privacy. So we see her walk off and
me, our genny mech and one of the MRAP drivers ran over with our jerry
cans and started filling them.... We got about 10 cans filled, and I
see the bitch start to walk towards the burn pit; Nose upturned and
acting snobish, with the wagbag in her hand.

She goes to throw it in the burn pit, and I guess someone had thrown
out a can of Axe or some sort of aerosol, which at that exact time
exploded, sending hot fresh shit flying and peppering the Sloptart
Female LT.

I couldn't keep my composure. I bursted out laughing and exclaimed to
the other two guys "Take a look at that stupid fucking lieutenant!"

She looked like she was about ready to cry...

Then she realized we were stealing her fuel. She starts running
over, and we grab the last of our fuel jugs and booked it.

I didn't have the caps screwed on, so half the JP-8 ended up on my
frog suit. I smelled like diesel the rest of the time i was out
there....

...But man was it worth it to see the stupid bitch eat shit... literally.

Oh! Thank you! You didn't forget!

Now I get to read and laugh at them!

[ReaperCharlie]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

omfg YESSSSSSSS

[ReaperCharlie]

Need moar Unicorns in the Mini Queue!

http://mafiascum.net/forum/viewtopic.ph ... 9#p2841279

There is only one spot left in my game!

(looks at Fritz, Kise, and KaleiDoscøpe)

[Unicorn Brethren]

"

N

E

E

E

E

E

I

I

I

I

I

G

G

G

G

G

H

H

H

H

H

!

!

!

!

!

!

"

[Stefunny]

KaleiÐoscøpe is quiet :3

[ReaperCharlie]

So are Fritz, and everyone else who should be posting in our hydra!

Also, FLAMEAXE! I want to write your paper, silly pants!

[tanstalas]

So are Fritz, and everyone else who should be posting in our hydra!

Also, FLAMEAXE! I want to write your paper, silly pants!

>.>
<.<

I still don't have access to the "QT" forum on the other site (why we didn't just use a normal QT I do not know)

[ReaperCharlie]

Maybe because you didn't read your PMs thoroughly enough like everyone else did.

Personally I thought you were just jacking off in your hand, waiting to show up fashionably late, like usual.

[tanstalas]

I sent a PM, you sent the request from the unicorn account so I replied to the unicorn account

"Register for an account on blah blah blah and send me a PM with your account there" - I sent you this PM to the unicorn account, so I am unsure what I am missing

[ReaperCharlie]

Oh, maybe somebody read it already and never responded.

Let me check.

[Stefunny]

Last night we played Halo and I may have been a tiiiiny bit drunk and I found myself "neighing" at people I had killed as I ran by...

[AGar]

looooool.

[ReaperCharlie]

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! &#$%, I MISSED IT!!!

You are hereby ordered to get a tiiiiiny bit drunk again tonight, and pull a repeat! <3

Fuben too

[KaleiÐoscøpe]

KaleiÐoscøpe is quiet :3

[ReaperCharlie]

So are Fritz, and everyone else who should be posting in our hydra!

This applies to you, Kscope! <3

[Stefunny]

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! &#$%, I MISSED IT!!!

You are hereby ordered to get a tiiiiiny bit drunk again tonight, and pull a repeat! <3

Fuben too

You said you weren't going to be on toniiight! And I'm not drunk, I am tired and in pain =( Ran around at work a LOT today and loaded/unloaded about 6000 feet of copper pipe onto the rack of the work truck. Ow.

[ReaperCharlie]

Wow. You do manual labor? Awesome. My type of chick

Get some rest and we will have some fun tomorrow night.

There is no way I'm getting on Halo right now.

I only got 3 hours of sleep last night and I'm not pulling for a repeat. lol

<3333333333333 though!

[Stefunny]

Wow. You do manual labor? Awesome. My type of chick

Get some rest and we will have some fun tomorrow night.

There is no way I'm getting on Halo right now.

I only got 3 hours of sleep last night and I'm not pulling for a repeat. lol

<3333333333333 though!

I work at a construction wholesale house. Most of what I do involves a forklift, but every now and then I have to get down'n'dirty.
Having said that this week has sucked. I work with 2 guys, one of which is the manager who is at a manager "meeting" (aka drunkfest) in Atlantic City and the other one is a giant baby who has called in sick half of this week SOOOO I'VE BEEN A LITTLE BUSY.

My legs hurt.
=(
Hot bath time. I may be on reach later.

[KaleiÐoscøpe]

Anyone on?

[tanstalas]

every now and then I have to get down'n'dirty.

DAMNIT, why does Stef always have the best quotes... damn, I'm full on sig space... someone else sig this

[ReaperCharlie]

DONE.

Added a winky face to make it look more naughty. ROFL

[ReaperCharlie]

every now and then I have to get down'n'dirty.

DAMNIT, why does Stef always have the best quotes... damn, I'm full on sig space... someone else sig this

And for the record, the only quote in your sig that's good enough to keep is:

Spyrex: Tans warped reality itself with his moon logic

If you take all the other ones out, this'll stand out more. Plus, it's hilarious as balls.

[gandalf5166]

No, the Starbuck quote is good too.